Skip to main content

The Mayor's "lost" speech to the city: the address Sam Katz meant to give

Ladies and Gentlemen...

I am announcing today that I will be running for mayor of Winnipeg in 2010.

(Pause for reaction.)

I'm planning a lot of big changes to the way the city runs, and I'm not leaving it to someone else to screw up. I'm sticking around until the city is running like a fine watch and that means one more term at least.

I may not be your typical politician, but my mother didn't raise a fool.

I will not raise property taxes this year. (Wait for applause.) Or next. (wait for cheers to die down.)

What kind of an idiot would raise taxes in an election year? Stand up Councillor Swandel.

There's going to be plenty of money sloshing around in the next couple of years, enough to keep Winnipeg afloat until after the next vote. That's when I'll bring the hammer down. (Note to self: Don't say this last part out loud.)

Before I go, I'm going to replace Plan Winnipeg with a new long-term planning blueprint.

In the coming months, I will be announcing details of a Transportation Authority Commission, a new jumble of people that's going to be responsible for expanding roads, bridges and transit in an orderly fashion.

And after I'm safely elected, I'll create a new water and sewer utility that can raise rates and blame the Public Utilities Board instead of me. Hey, am I getting good at this or what?

My predecessor was a flaming lefty who thought the only way to raise needed revenue for the city was to raise taxes. Genius. I intend to use business principles. The water utility will sell service to neighbouring communities. Once we've got them hooked, we jack up the price. That's genius.

I've learned a few things in the past five years as mayor.

One, Bureaucracy is good.
And two, pointless spending is fun.

Hey, it's not my money.

We've got all kinds of well-paid managers for every department in the city. On top of them, we have the city auditor who's there to make sure they're doing their job right. Now I'm going to add a layer of bureaucracy by creating a Chief Performance Officer who will take the auditor's reports and watch that the managers do the job they're paid to do.

Then I'll spend $3 million on an "aboriginal youth strategy."

Yeah, you and me both...what the hell is that?

That's the beauty of it. There's no definition. It just sounds great. That way there's no goals to measure success or failure, but it will sure help me get re-elected. (Note to self: is this sharing too much?)

Sure there are a thousand other programs in the city that do exactly the same thing. But I can't attach my name to them. This one's mine alone.

Your money is going to go to 11 projects that focus on helping Aboriginal youth to succeed through education, employment training, career development, leadership, and skills training.

Sure, White Boy. For you this means get your Grade 12, don't get arrested and get a job.

But when you attach the word "aboriginal" to anything, you've got to fancy it up or people don't think you're doing anything. So...

I am also pleased to announce that I will be recommending in this year's operating budget, to invest 3 million dollars over 3 years in our Aboriginal Youth Strategy to take advantage of our partnership and develop more sustainable, long-term, and meaningful initiatives to encourage employment and training opportunities that ensure Aboriginal youth have the tools necessary to succeed.

I just love to use all those big words to say dick all. Can I say dick? Sorry.

Let's get back to the city...

Let's face it, downtown is dead. We tried everything. CPR. Paddles. Transplants. Zippo.

There comes a point where you have to concentrate on the living. All together now.


I say "eye" and you say "key", then "ahh."

Everybody on the left hand side say Eye.
Everybody on the right hand side say Key.
Everybody in the middle say Ahhhh...

C'mon, where's your spirit?

We've dared to dream big to attract this major investment in our city. This Spring, we've got to hold public hearings. The usual boo birds will be out in force, so I'm counting on you to give me a little help here.

Okay, what else?

40 percent of the hotel tax is going into a pot to expand the Convention Centre.

We've established a new Special Events Marketing Fund to grease the bids for future conferences and special events like the Junos, Grey Cup, or the Canadian Country Music Awards. Skip the Olympics. Who needs that headache?

We've got our own headaches. We're still the murder capital of Canada. And the car theft capital. And the gang capital.

If Winnipeg is to be a choice city to work, live, and play,we need to be a safe city. We've got to do better.

But don't be asking me for money to remove graffiti or shut down crack houses. We've got to build museums for millionaires, and the money's got to come from somewhere. These rich folk are my neighbours in Tuxedo. They've got me by the yiechees. I had to thrown a developer under the bus this year to make them happy. And I'm the guy who campaigned on making Winnipeg a welcoming place for investors.

I would like to share with you some inspirational words from an unknown author.

"The highest courage is to dare to be yourself in the face of adversity. Choosing right over wrong, ethics over convenience, and truth over popularity... these are the choices that measure your life. Travel the path of integrity without looking back for there is never a wrong time to do the right thing."

This guy couldn't get elected dog catcher. I wish he was running for Mayor next year.

We've got to take advantage of the economic downtown. People who wouldn't be caught dead in Winnipeg now need jobs. Even in Winnipeg.

My advice to all Winnipeggers who have sought other greener pastures and have moved out-of-province, is...sure the winters last eight months of the year and we're colder than the Arctic, but we're cheap. Come home and let us be part of your solution.

To all the young professionals, you can't do worse than Winnipeg. Wait, that doesn't sound right.

Families and newcomers looking to plant roots - grow with us! We bust grow ops in every part of the city. Some pretty big ones, too.

Ladies and gentleman, I know everyone in this room believes in the potential of our City. Your action is an integral part of the future of Winnipeg. And that future is built on action. And today is the right time to take action.

Thank you very much.

Popular posts from this blog

The unreported bombshell conspiracy evidence in the Trudeau/SNC-Lavelin scandal

Wow. No, double-wow. A game-changing bombshell lies buried in the supplementary evidence provided to the House of Commons Judiciary Committee by former Attorney General Jody Wilson-Raybould. It has gone virtually unreported since she submitted the material almost a week ago. As far as we can find, only one journalist-- Andrew Coyne, columnist for the National Post--- has even mentioned it and even then he badly missed what it meant, burying it in paragraph 10 of a 14 paragraph story. The gist of the greatest political scandal in modern Canadian history is well-known by now. It's bigger than Adscam, the revelation 15 years ago that prominent members of the Liberal Party of Canada and the party itself funneled tens of millions of dollars in kickbacks into their own pockets from federal spending in Quebec sponsoring ads promoting Canadian unity. That was just venal politicians and a crooked political party helping themselves to public money. The Trudeau-Snc-Lavalin scandal is

Crips and Bloodz true cultural anchors of Winnipeg's aboriginal gangs

(Bebo tribute page to Aaron Nabess on the right, his handgun-toting friend on the left) At least six murder victims in Winnipeg in the past year are linked to a network of thuglife, gangster rap-styled, mainly aboriginal street gangs calling themselves Crips and Bloods after the major black gangs of L.A. The Black Rod has been monitoring these gangs for several months ever since discovering memorial tributes to victim Josh Prince on numerous pages on, a social networking website like Myspace and Facebook. Josh Prince , a student of Kildonan East Collegiate, was stabbed to death the night of May 26 allegedly while breaking up a fight. His family said at the time he had once been associated with an unidentified gang, but had since broken away. But the devotion to Prince on sites like Watt Street Bloodz and Kingk Notorious Bloodz (King-K-BLOODZ4Life) shows that at the time of his death he was still accepted as one of their own. Our searches of Bebo have turned up another five ga

Manitoba Hydro is on its deathbed. There, we said it.

Manitoba Hydro is on its deathbed. Oh, you won't find anyone official to say it. Yet . Like relatives trying to appear cheery and optimistic around a loved one that's been diagnosed with terminal cancer, the people in power are in the first stage of grief -- denial. The prognosis for Hydro was delivered three weeks ago at hearings before the Public Utilities Board where the utility was seeking punishingly higher rates for customers in Manitoba. It took us this long to read through the hundred-plus pages of transcript, to decipher the coded language of the witnesses, to interpret what they were getting at, and, finally, to understand the terrible conclusion.  We couldn't believe it, just as, we're sure, you can't--- so we did it all again, to get a second opinion, so to speak.  Hydro conceded to the PUB that it undertook a massive expansion program--- involving three (it was once four) new dams and two new major powerlines (one in the United States)---whi

Nahanni Fontaine, the NDP's Christian-bashing, cop-smearing, other star candidate

As the vultures of the press circle over the wounded Liberal Party of Manitoba, one NDP star candidate must be laughing up her sleeve at how her extremist past has escaped the scrutiny of reporters and pundits. Parachuted into a safe NDP seat in Winnipeg's North End, she nonetheless feared a bruising campaign against a well-heeled Liberal opponent.  Ha ha.  Instead, the sleepy newspeeps have turned a blind eye to her years of vitriolic attacks on Christianity, white people, and police. * She's spent years  bashing Christianity  as the root cause of all the problems of native people in Canada. * She's called for  a boycott of white businesses . * And with her  Marxist research partner, she's  smeared city police as intransigent racists . Step up Nahanni Fontaine, running for election in St. John's riding as successor to the retiring Gord Macintosh. While her male counterpart in the NDP's galaxy of stars, Wab Kinew, has responded to the controversy over

Exposing the CBC/WFP double-team smear of a hero cop

Published since 2006 on territory ceded, released, surrendered and yielded up in 1871 to Her Majesty the Queen and successors forever. Exposing the CBC/FP double-team smear of a hero cop Some of the shoddiest journalism in recent times appeared this long August weekend when the CBC and Winnipeg Free Press doubled teamed on a blatant smear of a veteran city police officer. In the latest example of narrative journalism these media outlets spun stories with total disregard for facts that contradicted the central message of the reports which, simplified, is: police are bad and the system is covering up. Let's start with the story on the taxpayer funded CBC by Sarah Petz that can be summed up in the lead. "A February incident where an off-duty Winnipeg officer allegedly knocked a suspect unconscious wasn't reported to the province's police watchdog, and one criminologist says it shows how flawed oversight of law enforcement can be." There you have it. A policeman, not

Winnipeg needs a new police chief - ASAP

When did the magic die? A week ago the Winnipeg police department delivered the bad news---crime in the city is out of control. The picture painted by the numbers (for 2018) was appalling. Robberies up ten percent in  a single year.  (And that was the good news.) Property crimes were up almost 20 percent.  Total crime was 33 percent higher than the five year average. The measure of violent crime in Winnipeg had soared to a rating of 161.  Only four years earlier it stood at 116. That's a 38 percent deterioration in safety. How did it happen? How, when in 2015 the police and Winnipeg's police board announced they had discovered the magic solution to crime? "Smart Policing" they called it.    A team of crime analysts would pore through data to spot crime hot-spots and as soon as they identified a trend (car thefts, muggings, liquor store robberies) they could call in police resources to descend on the problem and nip it. The police